1. Cast a wide net. My momma said love is a numbers game. Sure, it only takes one, but you’ll find him quicker if you put yourself in situations where you are meeting lots of people.

2. Avoid “instamacy.” Fanny Brice’s mother in Funny Girl didn’t trust that moustachioed smoothy Nicky Arnstein. She said: “A stranger should be a little strange.” Don’t rush things. It’s an old adage but true: why should they buy the cow when they are getting the milk for free?

3. Practice, practice, practice. If you are only going to date the perfect match, you’ll spend a lot of Saturday nights watching America’s Funniest Home Videos. (Believe me, I know.) Think of dates as opportunities to grease up the relationship muscle, (not that muscle). Angels don’t need to be singing on high for two people to share an evening and get to know each other. Also, it lets the universe know you’re fit as a fiddle and ready for love.

4. Know when to move on. My friends and I echo a line from The Sound of Music, the Baroness to Maria: “Come, my dear, we know when a man is attracted to us.” If there is a spark, blow on it and see if you can get it to burst into flame, so to speak. If it’s all ashes, remember the rule of diminishing returns and look for another prospect.

5. Make a play date. Meals and movies are all right, but try to plan activity dates where you can engage in something together and see each other in action, like bowling, say, or a museum or gallery visit. And keep it shorter rather than loner. Just coffee is just fine. I know it’s hard (literally and figuratively), but, especially if there is some zing, save a little for date number two.

6. Ask about him. There is nothing less attractive than self-absorption. There is nothing sexier than someone who is curious about you. Period. End of story.

7. Politeness counts. Don’t talk with yer mouth full, Mary. Be nice to the wait staff, please. Topics not to discuss: ex-boyfriends, bitching about job or roomies.

8. Make him laugh. Lighten up. Show a sense of humor about yourself and the inane dating process, it’ll make both of you more comfortable.

9. Be careful. Just like in the straight world, up to one-quarter of LGBT folk have experienced some kind of dating or relationship violence. Trust your spidey sense and don’t be afraid to make a loud fuss if things are going in a direction that makes you uncomfortable.

10. Be prepared. Remember, Boy Scouts, condoms and lube, condoms and lube, condoms and lube.

11. Get out clean. Scenario one: You want to jump his bones: tell him you’d really like to see him again. Scenario Two: Not in a million, trillion year: Say “I enjoyed meeting you!” Don’t: cut him off at the knees then and there, it’s just cruel. He most likely knows anyway and if he pursues you, a nice email saying “thanks, but no thanks” is the right way to go. Be firm and clear, it’s the only way. And anyway, the exact reason you don’t want to see him again might be the exact reason another guy will love him. Some people get off on strange odors.

12. Remember: dating is a no lose proposition. Nothing ventured, nothing gained. Even if you are kissing a few toads, (and, frankly, who among us hasn’t), you are putting yourself out there, gaining in ease and fluidity, and when your prince shows up, you’ll be confident, relaxed, and, most important, free to show him who you really are. And that’s what dating is for.